BIG Ideas by David Facer

February, 2005

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		Refer a Friend Activate Potential Website More Articles Executive Coaching Blog Speaking Topics Free Resources Contact David Remember to check the Daily Journal often. It's full of inspiration and challenging ideas to keep you moving in the right direction.

Feature Article: Flaying the Flip-Flop

Late last week I met with a chap who works for a large IT organization and has a big idea for a business.

Today he called to say he decided not to pursue building his idea into a full fledged company. His heart just isn't in it. It seemed to me, based on his rough sketch of the service he envisioned, the plan would have come together. But, that doesn't matter. When it comes to work, what a man doesn't care deeply about creating he ought not to invest his energy and money in, no matter how

much intellect and logic say to keep going. Why? Because, if you get one thing out of this article let it be this: more than any other single resource or outcome, positive emotion sustains efforts over time. Emotions make or break an effort. More than money, more than great market opportunities, more than simplicity, operational efficiencies, great products, credibility, loads of free time and all other forms of compensation. Overall, the emotions need to be positive. There is a strong place for the negative; however it should not be the default setting.

So, my prospect apologized for flip-flopping. Just the day before, he outlined his plan for funding and developing his idea, only to reverse course a day later. I told him the phrase, flip-flop, is overused and doesn't apply here. It's true; a great many people do flip-flop. I define a flip-flop as the wonton, even capricious back and forth, leading to no substantial clarity, wisdom, decision or positive productivity.

Recall that the phrase came en vogue during the recent American presidential campaign. That alone should make it suspect. More wisely, my prospect's supposed flip-flop amounts to changing his mind in light of important new insights. Here's a rule to live by; don't ever use a culturally popular phrase, particularly one that is suddenly buzz-worthy, before seriously considering its meaning and actively choosing that meaning because it is absolutely the highest thought and phrase you can choose. There is no place for small thoughts in great achievements.

There is simply no way to get from what is known and no longer enough to what is new and inspiring without going through intense tests in The Land of I Don't Know Yet.

Recall the phrase was originally defined in the negative by jabbing politicians. That's great for television debates with winners and losers, and water cooler banter. But, the major decisions in our lives will invariably, at some point, pull us kicking and screaming perhaps, right into the belly of the whale. There is simply no way to get from what is known and no longer enough to what is new and inspiring without going through intense tests in The Land of I Don't Know Yet.

	There is nothing wrong, in fact, there is everything right with not knowing. No enlightenment can happen without wrestling with the many nuanced sides of our big questions, be they who to hire or fire, how much to invest, giving a relationship another few months or going forward
(or not) with an idea everyone else thinks is a winner even though it doesn't raise your emotional needle off the flat-line.

The Consistency Argument
Consistency is given too much emphasis these days, partly because impatience rules the American culture. We all quote the quotes about Edison learning a thousand ways the light bulb doesn't work, and rarely apply the wisdom to our own approaches to life and business. My prospect is courageous to grapple with all sides of his entrepreneurial question - and do so openly. For a person to not flip-flop she must make a decision and make no change to it whatsoever. That's a recipe for disaster - and is totally out of phase with how we receive information...o v e r t i m e. Even after a formal statement of position, like a Senate vote, a man should - no - must - make today's view relevant to today's information. Sometimes today's information is a different emotional insight or spiritual view. After all, information is more than logic, numbers and external opinions.

Sometimes you need to seem inconsistent to someone else, and even yourself, to be congruent with what is right. Set yourself up so congruence with what is most right and true trumps consistency. That way you'll invite and embrace change and not fear it as too many adults in this country do.

What about Persistence?
Along with consistency, persistence is often brandished against changing one's mind. Yes, after all the information is in (or as much as can be reasonably gathered) and a strong decision is made, staying the course is essential to achieving the big objective. But, staying the course doesn't mean walking a molecule-thin line. It should mean working within reasonably wide boundaries that acknowledge changing information and influences, and allow for adjustments.

Before the decision is made, we should build into our timetables the process of continual excavation - of facts, probabilities, insight, lessons, experience, emotions and forward looking views of what is possible. Then adjust or stay the course accordingly. Not every piece of information is worthy of a course modification. Some pieces are.

Before the decision is made to go forward or not, even considering the notion of flip-flopping is just plain silly. There is too much self-judgment and self-vilification in it, and too little appreciation for the how we recognize, collect and appreciate information - in lots of pieces o v e r t i m e.

Here are four questions to help you evoke a lot of information about the decision before you. Answer each question until no more answers come. Don't stop until you've exhausted yourself gathering information, while honoring your timeframe for a decision. Ask them again and again until you've fished all the information. Look for information in all the important areas; emotional, financial, options, relational/interpersonal, spiritual, practical.

What would happen if you did what you’re contemplating?
What would happen if you didn’t?
What wouldn’t happen if you did?
What wouldn’t happen if you didn’t?

After this thorough evaluation, set to moving forward with your choice. If after you set your course and come upon something new and important, like my friend’s significant shift in motivation or commitment, by all means, allow yourself to get inconsistent enough to realign your approach with the important new information. If you find you vacillate a little too much and it is keeping you from making noticeable progress, work with a coach, or possibly a therapist to understand the motivations behind your hesitation and shift it.

And if after you've done all that you are still not ready to shout emphatically and enthusiastically "YES!" to the silver of the full moon, fine. Give yourself a break by giving yourself some more thinking, feeling and evaluation room. You are better off not deciding to go forward or back if you are ambivalent. Stay put until you can move forward confidently and enthusiastically. Trust that you'll make a strong decision in time. And for your own sake, leave the negative phrases to the quipping politicians. You need more insight than that.

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